craftgrrl | dragons and imps and sparkles, oh my (Reply)

Garden "stone" pendant, I have a lot of fun making these

Likewise

The following was created as a gift for someone who loves Pokemon and jokes about poop. Image is large and contains... Pokemon and poop.
You were warned

Because I can

Long ago, so the tales spin, to keep the tricks (or, more accurately, curses) of the night-fae-folk at bay, a family would leave a dish of milk or cream outside on the eve of the new moon. The fairies would consider the milk an offering, drink it, and move on, not causing any mischief. Some even believed that the sated fairies would stay nearby and protect the house from intruders of magical ilk (though this belief was more than likely horribly misguided).

One hard-working but not-very-bright forest-dwelling family, after a very long month, belatedly realized that the night of the new moon was upon them.

"Wife," the husband said, "we must leave out a saucer of milk for the fae!"

"Ohhhrrrgh," the wife said delicately, her brow furrowing. "Is that tonight again, already? Well, you've just used the last bit of it in your coffee, my dear."

The man slowly pulled his now-two-thirds-empty cup from his lips and set it reverently down upon the table.

They both stared at it. Their eyes raised to meet, and then crept back to the mug.

Later that night, long after the man and woman were asleep, the fairies came about, expecting their usual offering. Small glints of light flickered about the mug which had been left on the doorstep. At a whiff of the bitter concoction, tiny curses floated through the air, and the fairies zipped off, deprived of their cream, plotting future revenge.

That is, most of the fairies left. A lone flickering light hovered at the rim of the cup, then quietly dipped a bit lower, and lower still. A faint slurp, followed by a slightly less faint "blech!" broke the stillness of the night. Then many more slurps. A hiccup sounded, and then quiet again.

Until what seemed to be the sound of a hundred arrowheads zinging off the sides of nearby trees... and laughter. Maniacal laughter. All throughout the night.

The bad news for the man and his wife was that they had inadvertently created the world's first coffee imp. It would show up at their door at all hours of the day or night, a tiny wooden mug in its hands, raised aloft. Its only vocalization aside from the gooseflesh-inducing laughter was "Cuppa? Cuppa? Cuppa cuppa cuppa?!" which would become louder and louder the longer it was left without coffee.

The good news for the man and his wife was that the other fairies decided the coffee imp was quite punishment enough for the neglected milk duties...

One very clever wizard, who, like the rest of his ilk, was ever on the lookout for a new brand of docile servant to assist him willingly in usually-dangerous spellcasting, somehow tripped upon the brilliant idea of creating a creature that could not run away. Similar to most other wizards, he also decided that his servants had to be somewhat showy.

Enter the snapdragon.

The essence of dragon's blood was infused with different species of flora, creating an interesting creature that varied wildly depending on the base stock. Lacking rear legs and requiring soil for nutrients, the creatures generally would not travel far from their pots.

Rose snapdragons, while stunning to watch, did not fare well in cooler weather, and were also not easy to handle.

Ivy snapdragons clung to any task tenaciously, sometimes to the detriment of the wizard's health (see Wizarding Catastophes, chapter 73, article 18 - "The Smallclothes Scrubber That Would Not Cease Even When Said Smallclothes Were Being Worn").

The Venus flytrap snapdragon is best left unmentioned and was possibly created after a very long night of very intense drinking.

Some species, however, did turn out to be fairly well domesticated and are still cultivated today.

This is a very nice representation of the Holly snapdragon, or Draconis aquifolium. It is most widely sought-after near the holiday season as it tends to sing gentle melodies that, while mysterious, still induce a feeling of peace, even when surrounded by in-laws. It is thought that this species was employed by the wizards to gentle more argumentative creatures such as imps and djinn; it may also have been used to quiet the hearts of unhappy clients whose purchased spells did not work as hoped.

The Holly snapdragon is also very toxic, and, if eaten, can cause a host of unmentionable magical distresses up to and including the glittering squirts.

This is a representation of the Daisy snapdragon, or Draconis bellis. Originally one of the first dragon-flower hybrids, the species was soon discarded as a helper for wizards for its extreme tendency toward laziness. With a pretty white mane of petals and bright yellow snout, the creature adds a touch of color to any household. However, it awakens long after the sun rises and goes back to sleep well before the sun sets. During it waking hours, the Daisy snapdragon is content to smile quietly and look on at its surroundings in a rather unfocused manner, with many naps in between these difficult activities.

The Daisy snapdragon is non-toxic but it still does not appreciate having its petals eaten.

Thanks for looking!